It’s just a taco I thought after the guy I was dating turned his head and blurted out, “Must you always be so accommodating!” He really wasn’t asking a question. It was more out of frustration he spoke those words.
Guess what, its months later and I’m still thinking about his comment and if asked today, my response would still be the same. “It’s just a taco.”
You see, I’ve learned over the years to pick and choose my battles, and how to use my words. Although I don’t always use them correctly or in the right tone I am aware more than ever how important our words are and how damaging they can be when they are not spoken with love and respect.
That evening we decided to share an appetizer at Tommy Bahama’s and we agreed upon Ahi tacos! When they arrived he discovered they were not what he thought they were and did not want them. I suggested we send them back and get something we both liked and that is when he responded with “Must you always be so accommodating!” I gently told him yes, it’s just a taco. He then proceeded to tell me how all day long he gets his way. (It’s because he is a business owner and not because he was dating me)
Clearly by now my head was filling with all kinds of things I wanted to blurt out but I did not because life is short and why would we want to not make others happy!
Although we’re no longer dating the question still echoes through my mind. You see, it’s my desire to have a mutual loving relationship and not one that is demanding of its own way. I’ve noticed the older we become the more set in our ways we become and less flexible. I don’t want to be one of those women that demands her own way! However, it’s important to not lose oneself in our relationships. We need to stay true to who we are and how God made us. I can say one thing for sure and that is when it comes to decision making I don’t have a problem. More times than not I trust my judgement and when there are things I believe strongly in I will not be so accommodating.
I share this experience because it’s something I don’t want to change about myself, and one I hope the next guy will appreciate about me. As I reflect on past relationships I want to take note of things I’ve sacrificed and may have lost as much as what I’ve learned. Being accommodating, flexible, and giving is part of who I am and I don’t want to lose those qualities because it’s taken years of growth and hard knocks to learn how to be less selfish and stubborn.
I’ve learned relationships are about give and take. You can’t go wrong when you can be self-sacrificing. Life and tacos can’t always be about us! We’re no longer 2 years old and in need of what we consider “MINE” or “I WANT”. It’s time to learn how to share and make ourselves more accommodating to those around us for the sake of love and learning. Not to mention, peace.
My recent trip to Sedona affirmed my desire for more of God and how he created me. By having time to be by myself I discovered how freeing it is to just be “me”. No agenda. No trying to impress someone. I could just be me!
When I returned I was more convinced than ever to continue on the path of being the best I can be in all of my relationships. I believe it will be more rewarding when we just do us and not pretend to be who others say we should be.
Our character and qualities of life are not to be taken lightly but to be shared for the good of others. When we do this we can almost always guarantee a good and happy ending.