Love Is the Greatest

If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or clanging cymbal…

Love is patient and kind,

Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude.

It does not demand its own way.

It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.

It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.

Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance…

Three things will last forever-faith, hope, and love-

and the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13

God bless you and your day.

 

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Most People Don’t Know What They Want…

This morning I woke up to a different tune as the birds song came drifting through the screen of my patio door.  Listening intently it struck me that it wasn’t as sweet sounding as it was the day before. In fact, it sounded more like complaining.

I imagined the birds feeling a little like this…”Great, another hot day and my nest happens to be in the direct sunlight! Oh, right!  It’s Thursday which means that ugly old guy is going to come by and blow on my house with that long stick of his and mess things up! Dust everywhere, leaves everywhere and noise! There will be no rest for me!  Must I listen to my little guys chirping all day wanting more food and all of my attention?  Oh, I wonder if my birdies daddy plans on bringing dinner home or if I am going to have to go out and get it myself…and the crows!  Must I have them swooping down on my nest all day attempting to snatch up my little guys destroying all I’ve so proudly toiled over for my family.  All the rodents out there and they want what I have, can’t they go somewhere else for breakfast!   Looks like another day of protecting my young and dodging the attacks of the enemy.  Oh…look over there across the treetops, the grass appears to be greener on the other side…I wonder if I’d be happier over there…”

It reminded me of a commercial (see the link below) and how we tend to think what others have might bring us more happiness in life.  Thoughts of having it all or having more can distract us and take us to a place where we no longer consider the risk of being disrespectful or losing what we love.  Hard fact but we’re faced with the decision to be content with what God has provided to us every day as we look across our tree tops.

Even Abraham and Lot faced this dilemma as they looked across the land of the Jordan Valley.  (Genesis 13:1-18)  What looked like having it all to Lot and his need for more ended up being his downfall and brought Lot and his family so much loss and sorrow.  If only they would have been content with what God had provided them at that moment and time.  May we be mindful of how Greener…Bigger…are not always better.

Most People Don’t Know What They Want…But it is something different from what they have.

https://www.ispot.tv/ad/AqYe/time-warner-cable-greener

 

Girl Talk In The Sauna

No matter where we go there is always a conversation going on where someone is trying to figure out a relationship. Much to my surprise after my workout last night I made my way to the sauna to relax (secretly hoping to sweat off another pound). It was then I was enlightened to a new style showing up for the event. Interestingly enough some were fully dressed in their sweaty workout gear. Ok, I thought this odd with the temperature at about 120…and then there were what I call normal ladies (like me) prepared to sweat in a towel. As the room began to fill up we had another guest show up but her towel was twisted on top of her head and she too was in her workout gear! (This was the girl next to me on the treadmill with so much perfume I was forced to find another treadmill – ugh). She immediately went into her squat position pressed up against the wall with her iPhone in hand.  (I was hoping she was timing her squat and not taking videos) After about 15 minutes she had had enough, and so had I. This is not what I call people watching at its best so quickly I found myself a place to lean back and close my eyes but not my ears.  As I tried to focus more on what I was thinking and feeling I could not help but overhear the following conversation and decided to stay a little longer…

This is what went down, “Yeah, I am not sure if he likes me because we only go out when it’s convenient for him so I just wait for him to call and then say ok. He hardly calls though and when he does I can tell he is reading his emails or texting, and only half listening.”  Friend, “Oh wow, that’s not good.  Did you talk with him today?”  “Yes, he called today and asked if I was available Thursday before he leaves for Hawaii and I said yes, just tell me what time. He never gave me a confirmed time so I hope he calls later. I am hoping when he gets to Hawaii and is not at work he will have more time to talk.”

Suddenly my heart began to race as I fought back the urge to say calmly, REALLY?  It took everything inside of me to sit still and not allow myself to slide down onto their bench and join the conversation!  Both of her friends proceeded to tell her not to worry because when he is ready he will have time for her, and they were sure he’d call while vacationing in Hawaii with the guys. It’s always great to have BFF’s but I prefer the raw truth! She then proceeded to tell them how cute he was and how she knows he will be with other girls while vacationing with his buddies. Quickly I opened one eye to see who was sharing her heart and realized she could not be over 30 and she appeared to be pretty. Immediately I began to have a conversation with myself as to why so many singles are willing to find excuses vs. putting the energy into finding the “right” one. It appears most want someone or something so badly they find a way to convince themselves the relationship is everything it is not.  From what I can tell there should be plenty of fish in the sea… (http://www.citylab.com/housing/2015/02/where-in-the-us-are-there-more-single-men-than-women/385369/)

I believe there is someone for everyone if it is our hearts desire to find love. And I know we all deserve the relationship that values and respects us!

I have to say I surprised myself by not speaking up!  However, today I find myself sending prayers her way and wishing her success with love. As we all know love is a very tender thing and we must seek it out by first being tender with ourselves and not allowing anyone to devalue us. With that said, the next time the phone rings exude your “value” and consider keeping that line free for a more deserving call!

Only a Journal Away!

A story is only a journal away.

Well it’s time! I’ve been praying and contemplating on how to get going with the completion of my writing project. You see there have been days it’s been painful and I’ve had to stop. But through it all God has brought healing and encouragement. Today I’m looking at the progress, growth and answered prayers with a thankful heart for the many trials God has brought me through.  I am especially grateful for the tenderness he has uncovered through His mighty Spirit which He has placed so carefully within the walls of my heart.

These are just a few of my journals which boldly remind me of all God has done,  is doing and what is yet to come! I pray the pages can form a story that empowers, encourages and reveals more of God’s love and faithfulness for those who belong to him.  Let us never give up hope because with God all things are possible! Mark 10:27

The best is yet to come…

 

Matters of The Heart

 

 

What has taken up residence in your heart?

So many things fill our heart leaving parts of us unrecognizable as we navigate life.  Scripture tells us in Proverbs 4:23, “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”  Basically, our heart drives us whether it be good, bad or indifferent.

At times there can be a myriad of emotion from love to hate and everything in between.  All of which impact who we are and how we love.

As I’ve spent time reflecting on my early childhood I discovered one of my heart matters to be about “trust”.   At the age of 4 years old I was driving with my mom and soon to be new dad to sign adoption papers.  I was in the backseat of the car when my mom turned around to tell me something very important.  At 4 years old I knew it was important because we were all dressed up and I felt anxious.  Not sure if I was picking up on my mom’s anxiousness or if my heart knew something was about to change.

It was through my blue eyes I saw my mom’s brown eyes and big brown hair (Bee hive dew) as she leaned over the seat and said, “Now we’re going to go talk to a nice man and he is going to ask if you want him to be your daddy, as she looked across the seat toward the man I would soon know as my daddy. Now remember to say yes when he asks if you want him to be your daddy, and when we’re done we will go get an ice cream.”  Point being I was a little girl who loved ice cream and so I eagerly agreed.

We drove the rest of the way in what felt like silence.

Growing up I knew very little about my biological father outside of a few things I had heard from others.  All of which were not good.  This made me come up with a few reasons of my own for him not being around.  These too were not good.

It’s with a grateful heart I can say, the decision my mom made to marry her new man and make him my dad was a good one.  He has always been a man of integrity, and takes his commitments seriously.  What I am most thankful for is he never left and he always made us feel loved.

Unfortunately, the rejection experienced during this time left scars that would eventually cause trouble for me in future relationships with men.  Interestingly enough it was after my 21 year marriage came to an end when I began to experience these effects of betrayal.  During my time of loss and sorrow I would lay awake at night thinking about what could have been or should have been.  It was after a short time of this I realized I needed to move on and let go of what should or could have been. After all, the last thing I wanted was a hardened heart.  Before long one of my daily prayers was for God to help me so I would not become an angry bitter woman afraid to love.  It was in this determination I had the strength to move forward.  I began to trust God in a new way.  There were times it wasn’t easy navigating the broken pieces of my heart but I was fearful of what could become of me.  I pictured myself driving down the street with a scowl on my face, laying on the horn for no apparent reason outside of the fact that I was just plain angry at life. And I reminded myself of how this would not be pretty!

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not saying I never had pity parties! As ugly as they are I’ve thrown a few that have left me hung over from life.  But thank the good Lord for the remedy of friends!  Because in the midst of my heart matters I’ve had the love of family and good friends help rescue me.  It has been their support and unconditional love that helped pry open my eyes to the many promises of God. How we need God, family and friends!  I can see clearly how God used them to help resuscitate and push me through to the other side. I pray you let him do it for you too!

May these Scriptures bring encouragement and healing to your heart matters as you learn to trust God for more.

Q: Is there a heart matter you need let go so you can push through to the other side?

Today’s Scripture:

1 Corinthians 16:13 “Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong”

Isaiah 40:31 “But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

Psalm 138:3 “In the day I cried out, You answered me, and made me bold with strength in my soul.”

Psalm 139:23-24 “Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.”

 

 

Love Is…

So many different meanings and expressions of sharing love…what is yours?

In Honor of Valentine’s Day

In life we can find ourselves in a hurry to experience everything we feel inspired to be and do. The urgency comes from not knowing how much time we have on this earth and not wanting to miss out on what the world tells us we must have and experience.  For each one of us this can mean a multitude of things but this we can be sure of, we all desire to love and be loved.

For years I have envisioned myself traveling to Italy however, when my friend and her husband returned from their Italy vacation and she shared their wonderful experience I made the decision to wait and share this trip with someone I loved!  Too much beauty and romance to experience it alone or with a BFF! Not that I don’t love my BFF’s!

I quickly began to consider other options for vacation when one day while sitting in church they announced an Israel tour!  Immediately I knew this was my trip for 2015! In no time at all I had my heart and luggage filled up with everything needed to embark on this journey and BAM I was on a plane headed for Tel Aviv.

I heard from many how this trip would make the Bible come alive but what I didn’t realize was how it would resonate in my heart the great love and compassion God has for us.  The divine ways he works on our behalf to show loving kindness and provide understanding into His meaning of love.

I recently learned of a Rolling Stone magazine article on the two most frequently used words in music and the first is love with the second being baby (not defined as an infant).  To my surprise Google’s two most searched words are God and sex. Now if this doesn’t confirm how people everywhere are looking for love then help me understand why so many are searching the web for it!  After hearing of these statistics I felt an even greater urgency to share more about God’s love and the importance of not confusing the experience of sex with experiencing love. Yes, sex is a beautiful way of expressing love for another but it in no way defines the deep meaning of sacrificial love. God is love and he created sex so we know they’re both good and they’re both needed to keep our world and lives functioning as he planned.

In a few days we will celebrate the infamous Valentine’s in our own unique way with someone special.

And, in all of this “love” talk I am reminded of how the greatest love of all cannot be bought nor can we work for it because it is free!  It’s a sacrificial love that leaves us guilt free, shame free, joyful, and at our best. And most importantly God has made it available to us every day of every year!

Truth be told, I have some of my own love stories as well as those others have shared with me.  It’s through these stories and my life experiences I have seen the reflection of God’s love. In spite of everything the world say’s love is, there is one love we can always depend on and will never change, and that is God’s love.

No matter what your heart longs for this Valentine’s Day it’s my prayer that the miracle of His love will show up and sweep you off your feet.

Love is: 1 John 4:8; 1 Corinthians 13 4&5; John 3:16

Life & Love Require Action

The past few months have been a whirlwind of events, holidays and a life changing trip to Israel.  In the midst of all the joy and celebration life has availed me I often find myself having to make hard decisions. Such is life!  However, I’ve discovered the best part of life is LOVE.

Anyway you want to look at it, we were created to love and be loved. Unfortunately, love doesn’t always mean sunshine and roses!

There have been deep insights uncovered revealing my heart and soul as I’ve learned to let go and let love in.  What I’ve discovered is there have been times I’ve loved well, and others, not so well.

As I continue on in life I desire to keep learning and growing in this area so I can give to others what God has so graciously given to me, and that being the unconditional gift of love that was meant to set us free.  It’s a love that sometimes feels uncomfortable and other times, too comfortable. It’s a love providing strength and courage while allowing self reflection in hopes of enhancing one’s experience with love.  It’s a love exuding forgiveness.

I’ve found one perfect example of this love in the story of John 3:16 and the more I study and stumble in and out of love in this not so merciful and gracious world I discover what matters most is how I reflect that love.  No matter where I am, be it in a relationship, the store, the gas station, work, home or with a friend how I love is important.  How we love is important. It’s vital to our very soul and the soul of others.

So, I share today a bit of wisdom from a recommended book by a friend, The Seven levels of Intimacy by Matthew Kelly.

“But in order to love you must be free, for to love is to give yourself to someone or something freely, completely,  unconditionally,  and without reservation. It is as if you could take the very essence of your very self in your hands and give it to another person. Yet to give yourself to another person,  to an endeavor, or to God you must first possess your self. This possession of self is freedom.  It is a prerequisite for love, and is attained only through discipline…The problem is we don’t want discipline. We want someone else to tell us we can be happy without discipline.”

I highly recommend this book to those in every stage of a relationship as it touches on all levels as well as the dynamics surrounding those levels as you make your way into a deeper and lasting freedom with God and others.

Let me leave you with this thought from page 63:

“With your self in hand,  you can choose to freely and completely give yourself to another person in the mystery of love.”

Thursday Night’s NightCap – Walls

Have good relationships gone bad and created walls around your heart?

Last Thursday I shared some of my humorous dating challenges and how most recently I’ve become aware of what looks like a moat formed around my heart. For the most part I feel justified in its existence. Unfortunately, this wall can only hinder others from entering in and that is not what I want. What I want is to have wisdom, trust and an open heart as I learn to love again and allow someone to love me back.

Tonight I will have my ‘Thursday Nightcap’ be a glass of my favorite Chardonnay, Raumbauer. I’ll share some thoughts on waiting and dating as we look forward to letting love back in.

First, I want you to know I’m coming out of my funk from last week! I first noticed this on my way over to the theater after church on Sunday. I stood looking at the movie board and my eyes caught the new release, ‘The Perfect Guy’ starring Michael Ealy. I immediately walked up to the window and requested my ticket, one please. No, it didn’t bother me to go to a movie alone.

Of course popcorn always helps! After all, what is a movie without popcorn? I must warn you this movie is a thriller with scenarios I feel are important to be aware of while dating. You will know what NOT to do! It definitely reinforced the many reasons one should act wisely and not rush into a relationship. After all, it’s important to give ourselves time to learn about another. Let the good, bad or indifferent surface before rushing into anything unhealthy, or dangerous for that matter!

Seriously, the saying, “You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince” was not just a random thought! Not sure about you, but I can’t envision some girl sitting under a tree, wind blowing in her face, leaning back thinking how grand it will be to kiss many men, er frogs…before she finds the handsome prince! No, I imagine that would make her throw herself face down under the tree, pounding her fists in exasperation over the many exhausting dates and bad kisses she’s experienced in hopes of finding her true love.

If only we valued our worth as women and had the wisdom to know what is not good for us, at all times. If we could say in confidence, ‘NO’ to the wrong man and mean it, versus trying to make the glass slipper fit! We would be so happy and free to give our hearts to the right one.

Which leads me to ask, have you made your list of deal breakers? What about your list of must haves? Do you feel ready to enter back into the dating world with unshakable confidence that will keep the moat away from your heart? Are you prepared for more ‘girls nights out’, solo movie nights, and tables for one while you wait for the right man? If so, you’re on the right track! You can’t help but be successful in your search as you trust in the things you know to be true and wait!

As I continue to pray over these Scriptures and work through my dating fiascos, I too am prepared for more of the above. I will press on with patience and not lose hope in love!

I’ve included some Scripture to encourage and help move you to the other side:

*Many waters cannot quench love; neither can the floods drown it: if a man would give all the substance of his house for love, it would utterly be despised. Song of Solomon 8:7

*Promise me, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right. Song of Solomon 8:4

*May the Lord direct your hearts to the love of God and to the steadfastness of Christ. 2 Thess 3:5

*Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. I Cor. 13:4-7

Love. Changes. Everything.

 

 

 

From the beginning of time our world has been changing, evolving. We’ve gone from the beginning of time to what some are calling today, the end time. But no matter how you look at it, it’s been constant change. Each generation brings change, a new way of doing things and thinking about things.

Take the little # sign for instance. Over the years this little # sign has taken on a different meaning for people.

For example, #Pound or #hashtag?

I heard a funny story the other day of a guy who is considered a Gen X gave his gate code to his friend who is considered a Millennial and his friend could not get the gate opened to his complex. After numerous attempts he called to make sure he was entering it correctly. Yes, it’s 1-2-3-4# (pound). His friend tried again and as he said, 1-2-3-4 he stared blankly at the keypad looking for the pound sign. As he paused looking for the pound his buddy said, Oh I guess for you it’s “hashtag” and the gate opened.

Even the smallest change can impacts us.

Now I realize I am using a small example of change when I speak of the # sign but we all know change is inevitable.

God’s Word tells us to not conform to the ways of this world but to be transformed by the renewing of our mind. (Romans 12:2)

God’s plan was and still is to keep his people settled, secure and confident in that He is in control even when the world is in constant change. Some of the change we encounter will be uncomfortable but whether it is good or bad we must embrace God. In our embracing God fear will dissipate and we will then be able to live in the change without jeopardizing who we are and what we believe. This is when God’s love can shine through us and we can be the change in the world we want to see while remaining true to him and his ways.

Christians lived and shared their faith differently 2000 years ago than they do today. However, our God has remained the same. God does not change.  He is the same today, yesterday and tomorrow. (Hebrews 13:8) We too need to learn to be creative in how we reach the world for Christ. We will need to open our minds and heart to how we share our story, and how we will love like God loves.

His command to love one another and to love him with all our heart, soul and mind is meant for every generation past, present and future. Whether it is #thatshowyouchangetheworld or #2015 this command was given for our good so we too would know how to walk in an ever changing world with dignity, truth, love and hope as we move toward the end time.